DISCIPLINE of the WORK of OUR COMPANY

Clothes :

You is suggested dress in accordance with the pay that you receive. When we see you wear luxurious clothes, bring newest French bag or Italia shoes, we consider you live have enough by your pay and consequently will not have the salary increase until you are seen again poor.

Sick Permission :

We do not receive again the certificate of sick from the doctor as proof that you are sick. If you can visit the doctor, we think and you can work too.

The surgery action :

The surgery action is now banned! you as employee here, you must have all of your body organ. The surgery action can decrease your organ. Previously we recruit you with the complete body organs. Reduce the number of your body organs think as the violation of the work agreement.

The affair in the office :

Only might in the place that is determined in behind the warehouse, generator space, , the toilet (see the regulation about the toilet) that all of them were installed the monitor camera and the implement of the video recorder.

The free day :

the employees get 104 free days the work each year, that is on the Saturday and on Sunday!

The leave entitlement :

All the employees are given by the leave when that simultaneously each year as follows: on January 1, on August 17 (Indonesia Independent day)

The employer dies :

When die, the relevant employee, must give the notification 2 weeks beforehand because you must carry out the handover of the work to the employee of your replacement.

The use of the office toilet :

Too much time is thrown away in the toilet! From at this time, we will arrange the schedule to the toilet for the employee in accordance with the place of the name alphabet, for example: the employee early the name"A"might to the toilet at 8 o'clock to 8.20. The employee early the name"B"from 8.20 to 8,40, etc.. When you could not to the toilet in this schedule, you must be waiting up until the next day. In the case emergency, the employee may exchange the toilet schedule with the other employee.

The lunch hour :

the thin employee gets the rest eat for 1 hour, because mereka must eat more to look healthy!

the normal employee get the rest eats for 30 minutes in order to get the pattern of eating that is not abundant untuk maintain the form of his body.

the fat employee receives rest time 5 minutes because they just need drink fiber and the diet pill.

Thank you for your loyalty to the company. We are the company who really care about the positive attitude and the balance of empolyee

The Codes of Test

 

A group of medical student discus how to answer the multiple choice test tomorrow. Because they feel that test is very difficult and they don’t study then they agree to cheat to the student who is cleverest in the class. The cleverest student is agree too. They plan to make a code to facilitate the test tomorrow.

A, if the cleverest student holds his nose,

B, if the cleverest student holds his mouth,

C, if the cleverest student holds his shoulder,

D, if the cleverest student touches his chest.

The next day, the test begins. The cleverest student is placed in the middle and the other student travels around him while hoping for the answer from the cleverest student. The seconds, the minutes, the hours then passes. The students observe their cleverest friend ….. “holds the shoulder, then scratch, holds the nose from time to time sneeze, holds the chest afterwards scratch, holds the mouth afterwards scratch his chest”. the test ends.

Afterwards The students ask to him, “Are we succes? “.the cleverest student answer,”I’m very sorry my friends, last night I ate prawns, and when the examination my body is very itchy all suddenly, may be I get prawns allergy ….”

“So that codes.……?!?!”
“Sorry, I feel itchy, want to scratch,” answer the cleverest student.

Don’t Breathe

There is a patient come to a doctor. He asks the doctor about his illness.

The patient : "Doctor, Why do I always get hurt in my chest when I breathe?

The doctor : "its easy, you do not need to breathe"

The patient : “what…?!!!” (“the mad doctor” think the patient)

Send to the wrong address Email

 

A pair of middle-aged,husband and wife who together from the professional circle feels tired with all activities in the capital. They decide to go on holiday to the Bali island. They will occupy again the room of the hotel that is same when marrying 30 years ago. Because of her activity, the husband must fly beforehand and his wife just following the next day. After check in the hotel in Bali, the husband finds the room that is equipped the computer that was connected to the internet. Happily he writes the intimate e-mail to his wife in his office in the Jakarta city. Unfortunately, he is wrong to type his address of the wife's e-mail and without know he make mistake he continues to send this e-mail.

In another place in the Jakarta area, a woman again from the funeral of her husband who just died. Upon arrival at the house, she check her e-mail directly to read condolences statements. Suddenly she is unconscious after finished read the first e-mail. Her eldest child read this e-mail (not long afterwards faint also), that it told:

To: my lovely wife

Subject: Dad already arrived!!!

I know definitely you are startled but  the happy  news from me. Here they have put on the internet also, they said it can send the news for beloved people in the house. I just until and already check-in. They have also prepared all of them for your arrival tomorrow. Impatient i am waiting for you. I hope your trip here also fascinating like my trip yesterday. Love you Mom, Dad

PS: Here is very hot. If you want, children are joined too